For Better or for Worse…
Having a child will change your life forever, at least that is what everyone tells you the second they find out you are pregnant. You think you know what to expect, you are sure that you have anticipated all the changes that will come your way. You know about the late nights and early mornings – the nappy changes and the never ending Mary Poppins handbag you will inevitably buy. However, if you are anything like me, what you were not expecting was the drastic ways in which having this little bundle of joy would change the man in your life. So here are my top 5 Ways Becoming a Father Changes Men.
1: The Switch
The switch is the first new skill most men will develop. A handy little invisible hearing aid, that somehow detects the screams of a child, and automatically switches off. In the middle of the night, or in the middle of a super market… it doesn’t matter. The second the child pitch gets even the slightest bit out of range, suddenly daddy can not hear a thing!
2: Dead Man Sleeping
How the HELL do they do it? This one is linked to the skill above I am sure, because it seems that as soon as you have a child, the female of the pack suddenly develops super human powers that involve surviving without sleep. The men however, (or at least mine anyway) develop the ability to sleep anywhere, at any time. I am pretty sure that before we had kids my husband had no need to nap. Now on a Sunday afternoon, while I am dealing with screaming kids, sorting uniforms and making packed lunches, my husband can sit on the sofa and fall asleep instantly. This is a skill men will all develop – because let’s face it, it’s hard work watching us mums run around all day!
3: Toilet Troubles
The moment her darling child enters the world, a mother knows that her trips to the bathroom will be forever compromised. In fact, the moment one of my children sees me heading in that general direction, they instantly need to wash their hands and can’t do it at any other time other than when I am sitting on the loo. My husband however, has somehow managed to wrap an invisibility cloak around himself… and the bathroom. He disappears for HOURS at a time (ok, maybe that is a slight exaggeration, but not by much I can assure you) and sits with his phone reading the news in peace. I can assure you, this was not a part of his daily ritual before we had children.I just wish that during his time in there he could remember to replace the toilet roll! For men, once a child is born, the toilet is their only safe haven!
Ok, so those are the few ways my husband has changed for the worst… but the ways he has changed for the better definitely make up for it.
4: Growing Up
They grow up, and quicker than the kids, and sometimes this transition is even more emotional. My husband grew up almost overnight. The moment our first mini person came into the world my husband was handed instructions on how the hell to man up – and he did, in the most spectacular fashion. He became more responsible with money, put the needs of the family before his desperation for the next gadget for his geek collection. His attitudes towards how to care for his now growing family were just… well… more grown up.
You think you have seen the look of love in your man’s eyes, but I warn you now, you have seen nothing yet. My husband’s capacity to love was the biggest change of all. Yes, we all know that our men look at us in a loving way – if we are lucky it is even sometimes when they are not after a little tussle under the sheets at 2am. The look in my husbands eyes when he’s with his kids takes my breath away. This is the biggest change of all, and it will only serve to make you fall in love all over again. For the very first time you will actually see love written all over his face.
And that’s worth every sleepless night and crowded toilet trip!